Never Criticize or Blame

If you hold a grudge or blame someone for something, you are only hurting you. (TS page 166) It's a negative generating action.

Look for the best in life and in others.

Everything that surrounds you right now in your life, including the things you're complaining about, you've attracted. (TS page 27)

The things that aren't currently working the way you want them to work, don't spend your energy faulting or complaining about it. (TS page 151)

"One ounce of criticism will outweigh three tons of praise."  -Orson Scott Card

"Divest (strip) yourself of every harsh and unkind feeling." -Joseph Smith

"To be offended is a choice we make; it is not a condition inflicted or imposed upon us by someone or something else." -Elder David A. Bednar (Ensign 11/06)

"Give much less criticism for failures and much more praise for accomplishments. It is God's way." -John H. Groberg (In The Eye of The Storm, pg 287)

"Do not injure the character of anyone--hold all characters sacred. The 'unworthy' should be encouraged--the object is to make those not so good reform. Put a double-watch over the tongue--hold your tongues about things of no moment." -Joseph Smith (to the Relief Society organization, taken from Teachings of the Prophet Joseph Smith, chapter 39)

I love Elder Jeffery R. Holland's talk: "The Tongue of Angels" in the May of 2007 Ensign. Although parts of it make me burn with shame at past folly's I also feel the great love Elder Holland has for us and how he is so much like our Heavenly Father who wants the best for us. Chastisement is necessary for us to learn and grow.  How will we know our frail mortal failings can be improved upon, unless it is taught to us.  Elder Holland gives that to us with such great hope.  Here's a small part of his talk that really applies to the power of positive thinking:

"I suppose it goes without saying that negative speaking so often flows from negative thinking, including negative thinking about ourselves. We see our own faults, we speak—or at least think—critically of ourselves, and before long that is how we see everyone and everything. No sunshine, no roses, no promise of hope or happiness. Before long we and everybody around us are miserable.

I love what Elder Orson F. Whitney once said: 'The spirit of the gospel is optimistic; it trusts in God and looks on the bright side of things. The opposite or pessimistic spirit drags men down and away from God, looks on the dark side, murmurs, complains, and is slow to yield obedience.'  We should honor the Savior’s declaration to 'be of good cheer.' (Indeed, it seems to me we may be more guilty of breaking that commandment than almost any other!) Speak hopefully. Speak encouragingly, including about yourself. Try not to complain and moan incessantly. As someone once said, 'Even in the golden age of civilization someone undoubtedly grumbled that everything looked too yellow.'


I have often thought that Nephi’s being bound with cords and beaten by rods must have been more tolerable to him than listening to Laman and Lemuel’s constant murmuring. Surely he must have said at least once, 'Hit me one more time. I can still hear you.'  Yes, life has its problems, and yes, there are negative things to face, but please accept one of Elder Holland’s maxims for living—no misfortune is so bad that whining about it won’t make it worse."

Oh how I need a lot of practice on this one...starting with myself.